For want of a zip-tie the buckle was lost,
For want of a buckle the belt was lost,
For want of a belt the Jedi couldn't keep her Ion Blaster in one place.... Not to mention her pants....
As I slipped my utility belt around my waist, I realized I needed an extra weapon for where I was going; I needed an ion blaster.
I added the holster, and the ion blaster slapped comfortingly against my hip, but when I tried to secure my belt, the buckle came apart.
A quick reach into my emergency pouch and I came up with a zip tie, secured the buckle and my belt, leaving my ion blaster in easy reach.
I strode down the main street of Mos Eisley, my cloak billowing out behind, my lightsaber on one hip and the ion blaster on the other, both weapons in plain sight. I could be intimidating when I needed to, and going into the Blasted Ion Cantina required me to be so.
I was sure my contact would find me at the bar, how many red-haired Jedi sporting ion blasters could there be?
"I assume the Ion Blaster is the house specialty?" I asked the bartender.
He pushed the frothy cold drink across the bar, "One Ion Blaster," he said, "Blended, not pulverized."
I felt a presence behind me, and turned to face my mysterious contact, my right hand instinctively reaching for my lightsaber while my left pulled back my cloak to show my ion blaster.
He inclined his head towards a table in the corner of the Blasted Ion's dark interior, and we sat down across the table from each other.
"I have information for you, Jedi," he said, "But I prefer to be paid in credits instead of having my ions blasted into oblivion."
"You'll get your credits," I said, in my most persuasive voice, "as long as you don't cause me to use this ion blaster."
He snorted, and I caught sight of his right hand edging its way towards his Blastech pistol, and I ignited my lightsaber while pulling the ion blaster from its holster.
"Don't try it," I said, "As a Jedi, I always have my eye on blasters."
"Don't shoot me with that ion blaster," he begged, not realizing he was about to lose a hand to my lightsaber.
"Tell me where to find the gunrunners who are supplying ion blasters to the pirates on the Perleman Trade Route," I said, as I extinguished my lightsaber but kept it in my hand.
"If I tell you, will you put that ion blaster away?" He asked desperately.
"Tell me first, and then I'll think about holstering the ion blaster."
"It's the notorious pirate gang Kaldo who's supplying the ion blasters," he said. "They're holed up on Wayland, in a fortified ion blaster factory."
As I rose from the table, I holstered my ion blaster and tossed him a sack of credits. "Don't try to follow me unless you want the taste of blasted ions on your tongue."
With his information, Republic Intelligence was able to take out the gang of gun runners, and shut down the ion blaster factory on Wayland.
The true hero of this tale of lightsabers and ion blasters is the zip tie. Without it, my utility belt would have gone flying off in the streets of Mos Eisley, not only losing my ion blaster, but embarrassing me as well.
So I've added zip ties to my emergency supplies, along with hairpins, Velcro and extra ions for my blaster. You just never know when you need to keep something together long enough to vaporize it with your ion blaster.
